It's not just "two guys livin together" that he fears, It's two guys IN LOVE living together. Meeting out in the middle of nowhere may be as close as he'd get to showing his love and need for Jack, but it's it is a feeling for Jack that drives him to show up. A feeling he cannot name, of course it's love. He loves being with him, because he gets something from it. Something he likes very much despite his father's homophobic teaching and preachings about gay men. despite the fear. He said it, with this feelings of awareness, with Jack in mind , he concedes that he cannot pull in the reins on them. Even if he wanted to, meaning Jack has grown a part of him, captured his heart. The Ennis pre-Brokeback, is not the same Ennis post- Brokeback. I believe he meant it from the heart too. For as long as they can ride it might as well be *till death itself do them part. He may be conflicted inside as far as what his sexual orientation may be ,but where it relates to Jack, he is in love. All the signs are there and we see them. Wether he knows , or accepts what this *thing* is , it has him in it's grip. ready or not, He really does'nt have it under control, It has him , like a drug.. He can't help but love Jack.
And of course Jack understood him. His cowboy being sensitive, skittish ,reserved, and complex. He understood the fears Ennis had, but he did'nt give up. Unlike him, Ennis was afraid of saying what he wants and getting it. Afraid of taking without conditions. To Ennis, nothing is free, including love, lessons learned from a cold, hard upbringing. Everything good thing in life has a price, and dreams and luck are fantasy.. He's not trusting enough. I feel he felt he would be expected to do something in return for Jack's unconditional love. Something big. something he may not be ready for. On the one hand he knows he has everything to gain from being with Jack, on the other hand , he is afraid of dissappointing Jack and himself if he says yes to Jack's proposal, and can't carry through with it, paranoia sets in, Jack gets mighty hurt, and Ennis risks loosing him forever. Ennis paces the meetings according to his schedule , but after enough time has passed, Jack begins to feel they're going nowhere with the relationship.
Jack will never forget the summer on Brokeback, but needs a sign that their love found there ,is growing and reaching a higher level over time. as it should.. His dream of ranching up with Ennis will fill that void in many ways. A a little courarage, compromise and verbal communication would have served them well.
The distance gives Ennis way too much time to think imo, probably conjures up all kinds of scenarios about ranching up. They'd be outed, ridiculed , and Earl and Rich would eventually be repeated. Jack will expect this, and Jack will expect that, Jack is open, he is closed, Jack likes people and loves to talk, he can't deal ..etc..
Jack, the dreamer becomes increasingly frustrated , but where can he go? back to Lureen and a half-life existence?, and who else can he love this way? Who else loves him like Ennis does despite the denials. In the confrontation, he said what he had to say, He was'nt Ennis, he did'nt handle things like Ennis, could'nt stand it like Ennis could. Did Ennis understand that the *short leash was choking Jack? I think so, he had one on himself as well. In order to tell lies to himself, he had to be very aware of the truth about his feelings for Jack.. He loved Jack and Jack loved him in spite of it all. MO. Thanx.
WOW, that got me REAL good !!!!!!!!!!
wonderful post !!!
If I were to go back to the ancient theory of the four humours and the elements that comprised them, I'd say Jack was fire and air, while Ennis was earth and water.
It fits their endings, too; Jack was cremated and went up in smoke; Ennis was left with his work on the land and his tears.
i need more tissues
that's so poetic and so true
thanks !
tammy and lance, thanks for your kind words, really, my god, that's too much honor, you got me all blushing and all ...
(i feel even more embarassed than ennis on some occasions, so tammy, you know how much that means, lol !!!
)
The movie is about homophobia, Ennis' fear created by the childhood trauma of witnessing first-hand in close range to what homophobia can do, to someone he knew, maybe even was close to. You are so right about the fear of loss being the powerful engine in the movie, and the irony, the tragedy of it. If Ennis had the courage to overcome his own fear, to embrace Jack his whole life, then he would not have lost. It was the fear, that kept them separated, and the fear that caused them to be apart when Jack needed Ennis the most...
Fear keeps us separate as lonely individuals...Love brings us together into communities.
Even hate, at least, brings two people together into sometimes a powerful love-hate relationship that caused endless pain, but not loneliness. Hate, as you said, is anti-love. Fear is the opposite of love. Fear isolates; love binds.
lance, enbolded moments above are truly beautiful (in an awfully sad way, but beautiful still) !!!
" how could they live together happy, if Ennis didn't trust in jack they could be happy"
This was part of the tragedy. A struggle we are presented. These two broken desperate boys/men couldn't be happy together. Not in any conventional/traditional sense. But they manage, through it all, to find a way it could work, for them, in that time, in that place. Not prefect by any means. Gut-wrenchin in my opinion. Not for the faint of heart. Sometimes love doesn't conquer all.
ranchand
that's awesome !
you made me cry
topoex, you are one remarkable young man. What you said about trust is absolutely right on. I love your metaphors...Ennis hiding in his hole, and Jack reaching out his hand for Ennis to take hold, but Ennis was too fearful, and could not bring himself to trust Jack, or himself to have a new future. Bravo, topoex. You are awesome.
I am so glad to hear you making a choice, to decide for yourself what you want in your future. I know you will have a bright and happy future. There is nothing you cannot do, as long as you trust in yourself to make the right choice, and continue to search for answers to your perceptive questions. I am very glad you are here in this forum.
topoex, i agree with lance here
big hug to you
vanessa
