Topic: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory

[theresa]

(((((((Theresa)))))))

I've been thinking about you a lot these days, since you personally knew him, and you must have so many memories of him that you keep close to your heart and treasure. I hope that the loving people around you help ease the pain, even a little xxx

Darlin Keren!  How wonderful to see you here.  I have thought about all of you more than you could possibly know over the last year.  It's been a year of hiding and "licking my wounds" mostly for me, but I am emerging and going forward.  It has been a year of great pain, but also of tremendous love and support.  I have started a little blog in memory of him in which I've shared a few personal stories and memories.  Just celebrating his life.  I send tons of love to all of you.  I've missed you.

Theresa

[hpv]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's been a year of hiding and "licking my wounds" mostly for me, but I am emerging and going forward.  It has been a year of great pain, but also of tremendous love and support.  I have started a little blog in memory of him in which I've shared a few personal stories and memories.  Just celebrating his life.  I send tons of love to all of you.  I've missed you.

   Theresa, 
I did wonder how are you coping with this painful loss of a friend,glad to hear  from you,  I'd love to read your blog.....

[Nikita111]

 :\'(

Baby, with all the awards mentioning your name, I wish you could have been there and accepted them. You will get the biggest award possible for an actor and then it will be over. Your talent will never pursue in other projects, your personality will not mingle with new characters who could have carried your impersonation.

THIS IS SO UNFAIR..............................

I love you, I love you forever

[babytammy7]

Dearest Theresa, 

I remember you. I remember your post in the Candy thread. I remember the wonderful blog you were writing before Heath died. I remember what you wrote there when our baby left us. I remember all the beautiful things Keren, Michelle, and the other girls said about you and your friendship with Heath. I remember the day I found out, thanks to you, that Heath knew this forum....I cried a river...

Thank you for everything, friend.

I can't even start to imagine the hell you went through the last year.

Hold on. You have lots of friends here and out there. 

Love and big hugs.

Tammy.

[theresa]

   Theresa, 
I did wonder how are you coping with this painful loss of a friend,glad to hear  from you,  I'd love to read your blog.....

HPV!

I can't tell you how lovely it is to again see your names and posts.  How are you darlin'?  It comes in waves.  I'm doing well though.  It seems to hit me when I least expect it.  A photo, a fleeting memory.  I think those are the worst, when a sweet little memory will just flash through my mind.  But I am getting to now where I can smile at the memory and feel great love and warmth in my heart at the privilege of having them.  It's a day to day thing.  The intensity doesn't change, I think it's just that you take each incident as it comes and get through it.  

The blog is my way of celebrating the gift of joy he gave to me and also a way to share and cope.  I'd love you to read it if you'd like.  It's very young, just started a little over a week ago, so I have so much to add to it.  I'm writing personal little snippets as the strenght to do so comes (you know, on those good days).  This is the link if you'd like to visit.  I'd love to share it with you.  http://heathledgerrememberances.wordpress.com/.  It's nothing fancy, just from the heart.  

Hugs
Theresa

[theresa]

Dearest Theresa, 

I remember you. I remember your post in the Candy thread. I remember the wonderful blog you were writing before Heath died. I remember what you wrote there when our baby left us. I remember all the beautiful things Keren, Michelle, and the other girls said about you and your friendship with Heath. I remember the day I found out, thanks to you, that Heath knew this forum....I cried a river...

Thank you for everything, friend.

I can't even start to imagine the hell you went through the last year.

Hold on. You have lots of friends here and out there. 

Love and big hugs.

Tammy.

Oh Tammy, how precious you are.  Now the tears are filling my eyes, but don't misunderstand, they are sweet tears at being embraced by old and treasured friends.  Friends who understand your hurt.  Heath was so impressed with EnnisJack.  Yes, he definitely knew of you guys and was touched by your support of him.  You never dogged him or fell for the untruths.  This made him smile.  It was fans like you that made his road in the industry easier to walk. 

And, thank you so much for your sweet words about the websites I had.  They were a labor of love and I was and am so proud of them because they attracted the most wonderful people, like yourselves.  People that over the years I have come to cherish so much.  Thoughts and memories of all of you have gotten me through some very painful times this year and I will always be beholding to you for that.  What I would give to once again hear that voice on the phone, touch that sweet cheek or get a hug.  But when I start feeling sorry for myself like that I just remember how very privileged and blessed I was to have had them in the first place in order to know what it is like to miss them.

We have all hurt so much, in so many different ways through this and his dear family knows a pain that we can't even imagine.  But what a testiment to Heath that none of us will let him or his legacy be forgotten.

Hugs
Theresa

[keren_b]

Darlin Keren!  How wonderful to see you here.  I have thought about all of you more than you could possibly know over the last year.  It's been a year of hiding and "licking my wounds" mostly for me, but I am emerging and going forward.  It has been a year of great pain, but also of tremendous love and support.  I have started a little blog in memory of him in which I've shared a few personal stories and memories.  Just celebrating his life.  I send tons of love to all of you.  I've missed you.

Theresa

I've been following your blog, I admire your dedication and I think you're doing such a wonderful job of preserving his memory. I hope it helps your healing process, too... a heart needs a lot of time for that. I remembered some of your personal stories, like the time you brought Ingrid to meet Heath and how charming and sweet he was then. thank you so much for sharing it with us. Our boy was a real treasure... and I'll always be greatful to you for introducing him to our forum, I hope he could feel even a little of the tremendous love that we have for him here.

I wish you all the best in your personal and professional life... I'm sure Heath would've been proud of you and your accomplishments. I know he was always so supportive of his friends.

Keren xx

[babytammy7]

What I would give to once again hear that voice on the phone, touch that sweet cheek or get a hug.  But when I start feeling sorry for myself like that I just remember how very privileged and blessed I was to have had them in the first place in order to know what it is like to miss them.

We have all hurt so much, in so many different ways through this and his dear family knows a pain that we can't even imagine.  But what a testiment to Heath that none of us will let him or his legacy be forgotten.
Hugs
Theresa

(((Theresa)))

 :\'( :\'( :\'( :\'(  Beautiful words and so true. I admire your strength and your endless love and devotion. You were, you are, a true friend of Heath.

Wish you the best now and forever. You deserve it. Thank you for sharing your new blog with us. It's beautiful and so damn moving.

(((hugs you so tight))) 

Tammy.

[theresa]

I've been following your blog, I admire your dedication and I think you're doing such a wonderful job of preserving his memory. I hope it helps your healing process, too... a heart needs a lot of time for that. I remembered some of your personal stories, like the time you brought Ingrid to meet Heath and how charming and sweet he was then. thank you so much for sharing it with us. Our boy was a real treasure... and I'll always be greatful to you for introducing him to our forum, I hope he could feel even a little of the tremendous love that we have for him here.

I wish you all the best in your personal and professional life... I'm sure Heath would've been proud of you and your accomplishments. I know he was always so supportive of his friends.

Keren xx

Thank you.  He was magic and I loved him dearly and always will.

He knew how all of you felt and held that very close to his heart, it was precious to him, though I will say, Heath being Heath, never felt worthy of it.  But he was.

[theresa]

(((Theresa)))

 :\'( :\'( :\'( :\'(  Beautiful words and so true. I admire your strength and your endless love and devotion. You were, you are, a true friend of Heath.

Wish you the best now and forever. Thank you for sharing your new blog with us. It's beautiful and so damn moving.

(((hugs you so tight))) 

Tammy.

Thank you sweetheart.  It pales to the worth of the actual man, but it is done with love.  I am so proud to have you all sharing it with me.  What a great thing to have a meeting of like hearts in honor of one so beloved.  That's what this forum is all about.  It's a great thing.  We know know countries here, no religious boundaries, no politics, just love and a shared love and admiration for a great man.

[keren_b]

Heath was so impressed with EnnisJack.  Yes, he definitely knew of you guys and was touched by your support of him.  You never dogged him or fell for the untruths.  This made him smile.  It was fans like you that made his road in the industry easier to walk. 

He knew how all of you felt and held that very close to his heart, it was precious to him, though I will say, Heath being Heath, never felt worthy of it.  But he was.

Thank you so much Theresa, you have no idea how much it means to me to read these things. Honestly, I have tears in my eyes now. You see, over this past, terrible year there were so little things that I could find comfort in... I'm not a religious person so I can't take comfort in the thought that he's in Heaven now and looking on us from above, because unfortunately for me I don't believe in such things. and I always wondered if he knew how much he was loved. So to know that he felt some of this love, that we actually managed to bring a smile to his face, that we had this little chance to give something back to the man who gave us so much without even knowing... well, that means the world to me, and comforts me more than anything else. And yes, he sure was - and still is - worth it. Every bit of our love and our gratitude.

[LauraLovesLedger]

Hi, Theresa.  Only having joined this wonderful community late last year, I've yet to meet you yet, but want to tell you how touched I am by your recent posts here in this thread.  I wasn't aware that any Brokies had known Heath personally, and it brings me so much joy to know that you apparently did.  I'm glad to see that you're well aware of how truly blessed you are. 

I can more than understand your need to go into hiding to lick your wounds this past year; grief can certainly do that to a person.  But I'm also so pleased that you've returned to the place where you will always be in understanding, compassionate and loving company.   Amongst friends who share your love and grief.   

I had no idea that Heath had known about this marvelous place...  When I read your words on how he appreciated it so much, and felt unworthy of our praise...gosh, it brought such a lump to my throat, tears to my eyes for the umpteenth time in the past week.  But this was a beautiful kind of pain, a happier manner of tears. 

I am SO happy that he knew of this place, this beautiful community which in large part is born of his love, his passion, his gift.

[hpv]

The blog is my way of celebrating the gift of joy he gave to me and also a way to share and cope.  I'd love you to read it if you'd like.  It's very young, just started a little over a week ago, so I have so much to add to it.  I'm writing personal little snippets as the strenght to do so comes (you know, on those good days).  This is the link if you'd like to visit.  I'd love to share it with you.  http://heathledgerrememberances.wordpress.com/.  It's nothing fancy, just from the heart.  

Hugs
Theresa

Thank you  for the link 
Loved so much what you wrote:
"The point I’m trying to make is that in my efforts to celebrate life, I have again touched base with some of these precious people. I have heard from people from the Ennis Jack Forum today who have sent me such support and kindness. It is such a sweet experience for me to hear from these good people again, these people of like hearts, who also want to celebrate Heath’s life and not dwell on his death."
It's a treasure box...

This comment(about Oscar nomination) broke my heart .... :\'(
“To us (his family) it seems like nearly yesterday, and we are all still nursing broken hearts,” Kate Ledger said.

[theresa]

Hi, Theresa.  Only having joined this wonderful community late last year, I've yet to meet you yet, but want to tell you how touched I am by your recent posts here in this thread.  I wasn't aware that any Brokies had known Heath personally, and it brings me so much joy to know that you apparently did.  I'm glad to see that you're well aware of how truly blessed you are. 

I can more than understand your need to go into hiding to lick your wounds this past year; grief can certainly do that to a person.  But I'm also so pleased that you've returned to the place where you will always be in understanding, compassionate and loving company.   Amongst friends who share your love and grief.   

I had no idea that Heath had known about this marvelous place...  When I read your words on how he appreciated it so much, and felt unworthy of our praise...gosh, it brought such a lump to my throat, tears to my eyes for the umpteenth time in the past week.  But this was a beautiful kind of pain, a happier manner of tears. 

I am SO happy that he knew of this place, this beautiful community which in large part is born of his love, his passion, his gift.

It's so nice to meet you Laura.  This is an incredibly special place and they have always held a very special place in my heart.  To me, personally, they are the epitome of a Heath fan.  Each and everyone of them and I could myself so blessed to know them.  I see you are from Oz.  I am blessed to have good friends from the East and West of your great country.  My friend Luke Davies is originally from Bondi Beach, but now lives here in LA where he is continuing to write his amazing books and working on more screenplays.  He wrote Candy.  He is now making a wonderful short film that I've had the privilege of reading the screenplay to, called Air, which he is making with some of the members of The Masses.  Funny how small the world is and how some things come full circle.  Him working with Heath on Candy and then making his first film of his own and his directorial debut with members of The Masses.  And, then I had Heath in the West of Australia and several of his friends there and I are still close.  I just received a care package from Perth yesterday with a gift of my favorites, Tim Tams and Caramel Crowns, lol.  I'm afraid I am addicted to both and we don't have them in the USA of course.  Everytime my little buddy would come back to LA I would receive a gift of Tim Tams, lol.  Now the tradition is being carried on by other friends.

He did know how all of you felt and it humbled him, in the best of ways.  He never had any use for the rabid, gossip loving, sensationalism, but true fans he held in the highest of esteem and always always made time for when the opportunity presented itself.  He had the most amazing gift for putting them at ease and making sure he put them at ease, even when things were frantic around him.  That's why you see so many pictures of him taking his own photo with fans.  He never took the loyalty of fans for granted.

I'm so glad you found this place.  It is a special place indeed.

Theresa

[theresa]

Thank you  for the link 
Loved so much what you wrote:
"The point I’m trying to make is that in my efforts to celebrate life, I have again touched base with some of these precious people. I have heard from people from the Ennis Jack Forum today who have sent me such support and kindness. It is such a sweet experience for me to hear from these good people again, these people of like hearts, who also want to celebrate Heath’s life and not dwell on his death."
It's a treasure box...

This comment(about Oscar nomination) broke my heart .... :\'(
“To us (his family) it seems like nearly yesterday, and we are all still nursing broken hearts,” Kate Ledger said.

Please know that everything that I put there is to honor him and those who love him, fans, friends and family.  Yes, he died.  We cannot change that, no matter how desperately we try.  But he should not be defined by his death.  He should be defined by his life.  And, God did he ever live.  I do not want my grandchildren to come along in years to come and all they know of him is what is the emphasis on Marilyn Monroe or James Dean, that he died young and tragically.  I want them to know how amazingly, how brilliantly he lived.  He deserves no less.

Love
Theresa

[vedrana]

Please know that everything that I put there is to honor him and those who love him, fans, friends and family.  Yes, he died.  We cannot change that, no matter how desperately we try.  But he should not be defined by his death.  He should be defined by his life.  And, God did he ever live.  I do not want my grandchildren to come along in years to come and all they know of him is what is the emphasis on Marilyn Monroe or James Dean, that he died young and tragically.  I want them to know how amazingly, how brilliantly he lived.  He deserves no less.

Love
Theresa

Great words Theresa! 

I couldn't agree more! This is the goal we have to achieve for him and for his magnificent legacy!

[theresa]

Great words Theresa! 

I couldn't agree more! This is the goal we have to achieve for him and for his magnificent legacy!

Exactly.  That is the key.  WE.  It is the fans who are so devoted who can carry on in his name with dignity and joy and share that legacy and keep that flame burning.  WE can keep him from fading to obscurity or just being another name that in 10 years is associated with his death only.  I am determined on the blog to post all the old and obscure stuff.  I'm putting up video today and will continue to.  Old, rare video that I have and have never put up before from his younger days so that the new fans, who didn't find him until BBM or later will know where it all started and get to know him from the skin out.  It will take me some time as I have hundreds of pieces of video but I am determined to get them up. 

[keren_b]

You're so right Theresa. I feel that I want everyone around me to know how special and wonderful he was, I want them to know and to remember that. I keep a folder with all the articles and the tributes that were written about him by his friends and colleagues - Luke Davies, Neil Armfield, Terry Gilliam, Shekhar Kapur, Chris Nolan... all of them. all the quotes from his friends and his family who share their memories of him. I was talking to a friend of mine today and I told her, if you've read all those tributes, you'd understand. You'd understand why I'm still so affected by him, why I can't forget him, because he was so brilliant and talented and such an amazing human being, so special. I'm overwhelmed every time I read these things. Everyone who worked with him tells of how perceptive and intelligent and mature he was, so wise beyond his years, "an old soul". everyone says how incredibly humble and sweet he was, so full of life and positive energy, so charismatic and charming, what a big generous heart he had, his amazing ability to give. You hear that over and over again, from everyone who knew him. Both Shekhar Kapur and Terry Gilliam said he was like an angel who came down to earth, and that speaks volumes. You read all these things and you feel what a rare soul he was, how incredibly special and gifted. The outpouring of love from everyone who knew him is amazing... and I desperatly want everyone around me to read all that, to get to know what kind of person he was, and then they'd realize why I love him so much.

I can't imagine Heath fading into obscurity. not him. Because he wasn't just a pretty face or a sex symbol, he was so much more than that. Years from now his work will still be here to remind people of how gifted he was, but it's up to us to also remind them how soulful he was, what a rare human being. That's why I treasure so much all these little personal stories of people's encounters with him, they reveal so much of his inner beauty. He deserves to be remembered this way.

[ksxks]

(((((((Theresa)))))))

I've been thinking about you a lot these days, since you personally knew him, and you must have so many memories of him that you keep close to your heart and treasure. I hope that the loving people around you help ease the pain, even a little xxx

Me, too, Theresa.  Since last year you have also been in my thoughts.  As painful as it is to me, how much it must be painful to you.  Or maybe, to those fortunate enough to have been an actual physical friend or coworker, maybe having been with him in RL gives at least something you have inside you.  As opposed to those who never met him, who now never will...  But anyway, T, hugs to you.

kathy

[ksxks]

So beautiful, Keren, your words.  It is so true that beyond his work, it is what Heath's friends and working associates say about him that makes him an even more beautiful human being, beautiful and rare. 

And Theresa, I love what you are doing, and reminding us fans that we can keep his legacy alive.  And to "not be defined by his death."  That is an important thing to remember, and also to help in our healing.  Thank you.

kathy

[theresa]

Me, too, Theresa.  Since last year you have also been in my thoughts.  As painful as it is to me, how much it must be painful to you.  Or maybe, to those fortunate enough to have been an actual physical friend or coworker, maybe having been with him in RL gives at least something you have inside you.  As opposed to those who never met him, who now never will...  But anyway, T, hugs to you.

kathy

(((((((kathy)))))) How great to hear from you.  He left an indelible signature on the lives of everyone who knew him and the loss is deep and unfillable.  But he also left hope and joy.  It sustains us.  He set such an amazing example.

[theresa]

So beautiful, Keren, your words.  It is so true that beyond his work, it is what Heath's friends and working associates say about him that makes him an even more beautiful human being, beautiful and rare. 

And Theresa, I love what you are doing, and reminding us fans that we can keep his legacy alive.  And to "not be defined by his death."  That is an important thing to remember, and also to help in our healing.  Thank you.

kathy

Thank you so much sweetie.  He inspired us to look at every day of life as a great adventure and to never be afraid to try something new.  To him, if you were afraid or timid about something, that was all the more reason to overcome it and give it a go.  I honestly never thought I could do any of this again after he was gone, but I try to follow that example and plunge right in.  Facing what has happened is a tremendous fear for me still but I'm learning to dive in and conquer it and not let it conquer me.  And what better catalyst than celebrating that amazing life.

[lancecowboy]

Thank you so much sweetie.  He inspired us to look at every day of life as a great adventure and to never be afraid to try something new.  To him, if you were afraid or timid about something, that was all the more reason to overcome it and give it a go.  I honestly never thought I could do any of this again after he was gone, but I try to follow that example and plunge right in.  Facing what has happened is a tremendous fear for me still but I'm learning to dive in and conquer it and not let it conquer me.  And what better catalyst than celebrating that amazing life.

  Theresa  Thank you for that. I never thought of it that way. I can see now fear is a catalyst to help us face what we need to confront most. Festering un-confronted fear was what led Ennis to homophobia that denied him his sweet life with Jack.

I love this revelation about Heath. Thank you. 

[theresa]

Theresa  Thank you for that. I never thought of it that way. I can see now fear is a catalyst to help us face what we need to confront most. Festering un-confronted fear was what led Ennis to homophobia that denied him his sweet life with Jack.

I love this revelation about Heath. Thank you. 

You are very welcome.

[smartestsonia]

I am so touched reading all the above posts...It made me so very emotional...Thankyou so much for being there..
 
I knew Heath after he passed away.That hurts me alot as all those years I dint knew him...I was amazed to see his films and I connected with what he wanted to show us so well..I feel very strongly for him..There r so many videos made on youtube for Heath...Heath comes to my mind so often when I listen to so many songs. He is always there...

I remember not being online on 22nd of Jan as I was out of town and could not access internet but I remember thinking of heath so much and praying that he lives forever in peace in heaven and for u all who feel as hurt as me...Hugs to u all...

[Tony]

    Dear Theresa - have visited your new blog and it looks like a very good start.  Meanwhile, a question: on another forum you mentioned you have a vote in the SAG awards (and we knowwww......who gets your vote).  But how many of the SAG voters also vote in the Oscar race?  Or, more to the point, WHO are the members of the Academy?  Mostly actors and directors?   Tony.

[theresa]

    Dear Theresa - have visited your new blog and it looks like a very good start.  Meanwhile, a question: on another forum you mentioned you have a vote in the SAG awards (and we knowwww......who gets your vote).  But how many of the SAG voters also vote in the Oscar race?  Or, more to the point, WHO are the members of the Academy?  Mostly actors and directors?   Tony.

Hi Tony!

Yes, we do have a vote in our house.  My daughter, Christa Woomer, is an actress (a lot of people know her as the Planters Unibrow Lady though she's truly not ugly, lol and her Ellen Degeneres and Beyonce Knowles commercial among others and a couple of her movies), but I digress.  Yes the vote in our household was proudly cast for Heath.  And, what a great question you asked about who from SAG votes for Oscars.  The voters from the Oscars come from many entertainment areas, producers, directors, actors, writers, cinematographers, etc.  The number of SAG voters that vote for Oscars varies.  You have to be invited to join the Academy voting committee.  There are 6,000 members.  Or, 6000 voters.

[Tony]

  Thanks, Theresa.  Seems to me, then, the SAG awards may be more of a prediction of the Oscars, then would be the Golden Globes.  Oh, yeah - can't resist this:  your daughter is a knock-out, but nobody else but me would see some similarities to Maggie Gyllenhaal, in that she has strong facial features, like Maggie.
   I do hope they have some special remembrance at the SAG's.  Heath was, after all, an actor's actor.  One of their own.  Hope so.

[theresa]

  Thanks, Theresa.  Seems to me, then, the SAG awards may be more of a prediction of the Oscars, then would be the Golden Globes.  Oh, yeah - can't resist this:  your daughter is a knock-out, but nobody else but me would see some similarities to Maggie Gyllenhaal, in that she has strong facial features, like Maggie.
   I do hope they have some special remembrance at the SAG's.  Heath was, after all, an actor's actor.  One of their own.  Hope so.

Aren't you a sweetheart.  I let my daughter read your comment and she said to please thank you and to tell you, you are so sweet. 

I think that there will be something nice tonight I really do.  I know that they honored him last year, and I doubt that there will be another this year, however, I truly believe he will be the winner as actors appreciate an incredible job in a role like no one else can, and I think that moment will be incredibly special.

[ksxks]

Aren't you a sweetheart.  I let my daughter read your comment and she said to please thank you and to tell you, you are so sweet. 

I think that there will be something nice tonight I really do.  I know that they honored him last year, and I doubt that there will be another this year, however, I truly believe he will be the winner as actors appreciate an incredible job in a role like no one else can, and I think that moment will be incredibly special.

I looked up your daughter, too -- I love her looks!  She's not just lovely, but uniquely full of character.  And a bit of a bad-ass.  And I mean that in the best way -- cool and intriguing.

My best friend's husband is on the Oscars voting, so I'll be interested to know how he votes.

But back on topic, I'm watching the SAG Awards right now.  I liked the "Trailblazers" special little tribute thing they did -- cool look at all different kind of trailblazers in TV and movies.  And I'm so glad they showed Ennis and Jack (in the Dozy Embrace) in the "gay" segment.  And that it ended with the Joker!  Awesome.

I just have the most fond memories of the SAG awards when Heath and Jake were there that year.  That was so charming, when they introduced BBM.  (I thought it was weird that they had to do that, but I've since figured out that the stars of a film are always the one who introduce it.)

So...I want to see what is in the stars tonight for Heath...  Back later.

kathy