Read the whole thing in one sitting and cried my eyes out at the same parts I did in my two viewings of the movie: the classic "embrace from behind" scene and the shirts. God, the shirts.
I'm probably going again tomorrow with my mother. It was easier, a lot easier, to read the screenplay now, because the last time I saw the movie was not this last Sunday but the Sunday before that, and I'm relatively detached, I believe, for now. Still sobbed like a baby toward the end... but not the same lasting, grieving, hopeless feeling I felt after the first and second viewings. I'm wondering if I'm even going to go through it again tomorrow when I see it again, and I'm pretty sure I will, but I'm scared that it won't be as heavy as it first was. I don't know why I want it to be so bad because it kills me, it makes it difficult to focus on anything and just tears my heart out, but at the same time I want to be able to relive that feeling, I need it.
And who am I kidding, I'm sure I will. I've been purposely blocking the thoughts for the past week and a half because it was the only way I'd make it through normal life.
Also, Annie's essay "Getting Movied" was extraordinarily informative and entertaining. I felt especially connected to this quote:
It is an eerie sensation to see events you have imagined in the privacy of your mind, and tried hopelessly to transmit to others through little black marks on a page, loom up before you in an overwhelming visual experience.
Being an aspiring writer myself, I understand -exactly- what she means by "trying hopelessly to transmit to others through little black marks on a page," and to write a story like this and see my words spoken by actors and changing hearts and lives out there in the world, if my story touched -one person- as this story has touched all of us here at this forum, my life would be absolutely complete.
Much love.