Topic: Compilation of Tributes to Heath Ledger

[chameau]

i'm still crying everyday when i see his pics or when i read every thot of everyone who miss him as much as i do...i miss him so much...my best friend is sick about heath ledger and i really donno with who i could talk...and i thot here i can find people who love him as much as i do...i was waching casanova and i was so happy...at the end of the movie i cried even if i saw it 2 imes before:)) it was just beautiful...btw casanova was the first movie with heath ledger wich i saw...i love painting...and i took picturesc on the tv screen just to make a portrait of heath:)) i was very happy:p.then i start doing it...i finished it 2 days later in the morning....that evening i was waching the news...than my happiness became a silent cry...i refused to belive such a stupit thing...my beloved heathdied because of an overdoze...he was not a junkie...god he made a movie (candy) helping the fight with the drogs:((...then the doctors said it was because of the doctors...i've became obsesd my ringtone is the song th wings:((...it's so sad...i miss him a lot...he was just lie a friend to me:( i'm listening to "i stil cry" it's such a sad song...i thing about him everyday when i listen it...i will post the lyrics:(... :\'( :\'( :\'(I Still CryI`m making flowers out of paper
While darkness takes the afternoon
I know that they won`t last forever
But real ones fade away to soon

Chorus:
I still cry sometimes when I remember you
I still cry someitmes when I hear your name
I said goodbye and I know you`re alright now
But when the leaves start falling down I still cry

It`s just that I recall September
It`s just that I still hear your song
It`s just I can`t seem to remember
Forever more those days are gone

Chorus:
I still cry sometimes when I remember you
I still cry sometimes when I hear your name
I said goodbye and I know you`re alright now
But when the leaves start falling down I still cry

I still cry sometimes when I rememeber you
I still cry sometimes when I hear your name
I said goodbye and I know you`re alright now
But when the leaves start falling down I still cry
But when the leaves start falling down I still cry
  I Still Cry

[chameau]

This is the end of everything, this is the end I know.
This is the end of everything, take your love with you when you go.
This is the end of happiness, this is the end dreams.
This is the end of everything, it's the end for you and me.
I don't know, what to do.
In my heart I still love you.

I don't know, what to say.
I will always feel this way.
This is the end of everything, this is the end I know.
This is the end of everything, take your love with you when you go.

Chris Isaac

[chameau]

I've been avoiding this thread for my own well being but that's shot to hell so..I'm about 4 pages behind now. Anyway we left a memorial in Carson Park in Eau Claire this past weekend during the Brokie meet. I won't give the play by play (some Brokies are working on something) but Keren chose a perfect spot for him overlooking the water. It's in this spot that looks like it was just carved out for this purpose. Pauline did a lovely reading and Barb placed the wreath in the ground.  :\'(

This is from when we first left it:






A few of us went back later to visit and reflect and the sun was shining right on it:






And before we left for the airport, Barb and I went back and visited Monday morning and spent a long time there. We each took a coin and made a wish before throwing the coins into the lake.



His view


and the view from the top



So he's surrounded by light all day and the sounds of birds singing and water softly lapping against the bank  :\'(

[chameau]

I would love to build a memorial with some Brokies. I was where his body laid in that chapel in Los Angeles the morning after, but I didn't know he had been mourned there.  It is just a place I find peace.  I'll have to let my tears and words be my memorial for now.  Lucky are those who came together and found a way of laying something down to find some peace.

jessi

Where can I build a memorial,
place stones and flowers for you,
far away from shore,
miles out to sea,
for you never just tread at the edge?
Where can I place tear soaked stones,
in middle of a desert where sun shines brightest,
and endless miles to roam, where great beauty
is hard to find,
the rarest of all hoarded?
Where can I bow in pain, choke on sobs,
build my memorial for you,
a mountain, in fields of wildflowers where not one
shows a glance of your greatness, or
a forest,
is there a tree magnificent enough, so tall and sturdy,
to put stones beneath, or
prairies...great plains washed pure enough for your compassion,
understanding,
my love?
Sweet angel,
my eyes and senses have been blessed
with heavenly sights,
this earth,
more magnificence than my soul should know,
I've seen,
but none,
not one,
worthy enough to place a stone
in memory.
Sweet angel,
all I have,
lifelong love
and thoughts,
heart full of your wonder, memories,
my words,
singing of you,
my memorial, sweet baby,
how, oh Lord how,
can I build a memorial for you?

jessi
5-10-08
forever

[chameau]

For you dear brokies. I have cut a lot of first pages magazines to make a "patchwork"..: Hope you'll enjoy it.

I still miss him...And what about you ?

A lot of thanks to Alicia, Zankou and LD...I have a lot of other magazines and soon, I"ll do other "patchworks" for you dear brokies 

That pic again...even if it has been posted before, because He is so wonderful on it 

We still love you dear Heatcliff Ledger, we'll never forget you, I swear.

[chameau]

I had a dream of Heath last night.  I was a friend of the family, and was hanging out with Heath, Michelle and a number of others at a party.  (I don't remember Matilda being there.)  I was so aware of having the most serious hots for Heath and so I was avoiding eye contact, though often standing close, etc.  Let me tell you, he was such a presence in the room.  Definitely "larger than life."  Then, a very strong moment at the end when we sat together and finally our eyes met.  Nothing to do with the "hots" at that moment, just of a very powerful connection.  End of dream...  And I'm glad I had it.  Like a moment of hello and goodbye perhaps.

kathy

[chameau]

Asali and I made this tribute video for Heath, the video footage and some pictures are from our meeting in Eau Claire, for now we were only able to upload it to livevideo.




This is what Asali read during the video, this is the poem on the wreath made by LuvJackNasty

In Our Hearts
(author unknown)

We thought of you with love today,
But that is nothing new.
We thought about you yesterday,
And the days before that, too.
We think of you in silence.
We often speak your name.
Now all we have is memories,
And your picture in a frame.
Your memory is our keepsake,
With which we'll never part.
God has you in His Keeping.
We have you in our Heart.



And these are the significance of the flowers used by LuvJackNasty

Pink Carnation: I'll never forget you; gratitude. The carnation is the flower of January

White Roses: Reverence and remembrance

Daisy: Loyal love; youth.  The daisy is the flower of April.

And this is the video on livevideo

http://www.livevideo.com/video/19C76F821D10454F91FE240BD83BA49A/tribute-to-heath-at-eau-claire.aspx

Huh, may we suggest to have tissues ready? 

[chameau]

I thought of you and how you love this beauty,
And walking up the long beach all alone
I heard the waves breaking in measured thunder
As you and I once heard their monotone.

Around me were the echoing dunes, beyond me
The cold and sparkling silver of the sea --
We two will pass through death and ages lengthen
Before you hear that sound again with me.

Sarah Teasdale

[chameau]

In all your looks you've always been beautiful;but not as much as your soul.Short life has been yours;but always full with projects,ideas and LOVE.
REST IN PEACE,SWEET EYES ANGEL.

[chameau]

Hello friends.

RL has been very demanding and I haven't been able to visit this thread much over the last few days. Now that I have caught up, I just have to say that I'm overwhelmed and so heartened by all of the wonderful things you have expressed. The love and appreciation for Heath and for each other can be felt pouring out of the computer screen. It is, once again, an amazing tribute to the people who brought us BBM and the family we have created here in honor of that.

Thank you for all of the videos, collages, poems and personal thoughts you have posted. Knowing that we share these feelings really is such a comfort. Tony, this was beautifully stated:


Dear jessi - so beautiful and most of all, so heartfelt.  It's human nature to want that memorial place we can go, to remember.  But the only one I know of that will last, is us. I'd love to see that place we could go, but strangely enough, or maybe not so strangely, we are, ourselves, the memorial to Heath.  Each in our own way.  The outside world would never understand.  Again, keep writing, jessi - for us and our sweet angel.

And it echoes the same idea that Michelle shared, when she said that "we are all laying memorial with each word here."

Can you imagine a better tribute than to have so many people from all around the world celebrate your spirit and your memory, and carry that celebration forth in their own lives? He is a lucky man, to have left such a legacy, and we are lucky people, to have been the recipients of it.

[chameau]

A very early morning to you all

This weeks been tough..just when I was beginning to believe that I'd managed to get my head around it and accept that Heath is not longer here..every advert break during my guilty pleasure of Hollyoaks (A UK soap) has had a trailer for Brokeback Mountain ahead of it;s terrestrial premiere on Sunday ..and there he is living and breathing ..his pictures in all the listing mags and I feel like I've been punched in the stomach again and find myself back in a state of disbelief waiting to wake up

But I cling on to my belief that he's out there somewhere looking in and walking alongside he loved dearly. But also as well in better world not visible to our eyes yet. And yes it hurts that we can't see him, but one day we will again. But he will not be forgotten by those of us he left behind, who simply loved him from afar and let him into our lives through his films. We all post because he had an impact on our lives. Through his work and the way he went about his life he taught us so many important lessons and mrals that the greatest tribute we could pay to Heath is to incorporate those ways and values, not to mention his love of life into our own lives. Follow our dreams..make every second count, love and be true to ourselves. Heath didn't just change his own stars through his lifestyle and the films he chose to make, he changed ours too. And those of us, lucky enough to be here and pay attention during Heath's time here will never let what he achieved be forgotten. I'm sure in fifty, maybe even a hunderd years, he'll be seen as one of the all time greats, but we were the lucky ones who got to watch as it happen.

And though ways of the Universe we simply cannot fathom, I like to think he hears our thoughts about him, our prayers, that he saw all the tributes left outside his apartment and all around the world, that he was there on the beach that day with his friends and that he ses every post about him on forums and every video. And while I'm sure he in true Heath fashion would be embarrased by it, is inside beaming with the love thats has been shown for him and the tributes paid to him. And with a smile, and a twinkle in his eye, off he goes on his skateboard.

So yes, I like to believe he sees every post that is here. And I feel truly honoured to be a part of this forum, even though I haven't posted much due to real life getting in the way, and to be honest feelign sometimes, I had nothing to say that hadn't already been said a thousand times better. I just wished I joined a long long time ago, after I'd seen Brokeback to have joined in on all the discussions then. But this place is a remarkable part of Heath's legacy. And I hope it long continues. For as I read post over post that astounds me, with it's beautiful poetry and thoughts,and pictures, I can not be more grateful that all you wonderful people out there around the world have been brought together here and through your words and actions paying the biggest compliments to our prince among men, our troubled cowboy, our inquisitive storyteller, our Casanova, our evil Joker  - for he's all of these and so much more - the beautiful spirit that is Heath Ledger.

(Sorry about the length)

[chameau]

Today I saw somebody who looked just like you
He walked like you do I thought he was you
And as he turned the corner I called out your name
I felt so ashamed cause it wasn't you wasn't you

You are everything and everything is you

How can I forget when each face that I see
Brings backs memories of being with you
I just can't go on living life as I do
Comparing each one with you
Because they just won't do
They're not you

You are everything and everything is you

Kim Carnes

[chameau]

4 months ago you began another journey to another place that is now your home.Although you live in thousands of little homes:our hearts.I miss you so much I can't hardly stand it... 

[chameau]

4 months since u are dead...4 fu**ing months.it;s unfair...u are my fav actor and u are not here to make for me new movies.to make me laugh cry or be happy.i won't know how u would look when u would be old....i am  so sad that i can tell u my sweet angel.aniway thank you for coming in my dreams and talking with me and i think that u are sad and happy in the same time.happy that u had matilda and sad cause u won't see her as a teen as a mother or as a wife...i guess it's horible...love u a lot my wonderful angel...

[chameau]

For my sweet Casanova Heath



I had closed the door upon my heart
And wouldn't let anyone in,
I had trusted and loved only to be hurt
But, that would never happen again.

I had locked the door and tossed the key
As hard, and as far as I could,
Love would never enter there again,
My heart was closed for good.

Then you came into my life
And made me change my mind,
Just when I thought that tiny key
was impossible to find.

That's when you held out your hand
And proved to me I was wrong,
Inside your palm was the key to my heart...
You had it all along.

Miss you baby

[chameau]

Love of my life, you hurt me
You've broken my heart and now you leave me.
Love of my life can't you see,
Bring it back, bring it back,
Don't take it away from me,
Because you don't know, what it means to me.

Love of my life don't leave me,
You've stolen my love, you now desert me,
Love of my life can't you see,
Bring it back, bring it back,
Don't take it away from me
Because you don't know, what it means to me.


...Back - hurry back,
Don't take it away from me,
because you don't know what it means to me

May the sun always shine on you baby

[chameau]

OMG, Keren and Marj....  :\'( :\'( :\'( :\'( :\'( That's so precious and heartbreaking...... :\'( :\'( :\'( :\'(

I cannot believe it's been 4 months. I was stunned because when I woke up this morning, I didn't even realize what day it was. Then, all of the sudden in my 1st class, it hit me. I couldn't do anything but sit there. So I did, but I closed my eyes and gave a short little prayer and kissed the wristband on my right wrist. I wear it everyday and everyday I feel that he is with me and I carry a piece of him in my heart.

Heath, may you be humble, and calm in your new home, and may you never forget how much we love you.

4 months, damn..

[chameau]

Last Friday I went to my cousin's memorial, he was killed 21 years ago, when he was 23... we went to his grave and stood there, and his sister read out loud something that she's wrote. She told how, when she was a kid, she saw her neighbours crying over the grave of their son who's been dead for 10 years and she asked herself, 'do you still cry after 10 years? Does it still hurt that much?' And now, standing in front of her brother's grave she said, "21 years later I can tell you: Yes, it still hurts so much." And they all cried, his parents and his sisters. I stood there and couldn't help thinking about Heath. We love him, and we cry over him, but we didn't really know him in real life... how much time is it gonna take for the pain to lessen? Some day it's not going to hurt that much, is it? Years from now... but for his family, his parents and his sisters, the people who were a real part of his life and he was a part of theirs - this pain is never going away.

[chameau]

A SO GREAT TALENT AS YOURS SHOULD BE BY OUR SIDE TO GIVE US ALL THE EMOTIONS YOUR ROLES MADE US FEEL.BUT SOMEONE IN THE HIGH HAS WANTED YOU TO PERFORM AN ETERNAL ROLE IN HEAVEN...

[chameau]

    All through this memorial thread, there've been occasional wonderings and, yes, insecurities, about saying you have loved someone you never met.  A person can feel like : "What's wrong with me?  I'm grieving all these months later over someone who never knew I even existed and who I never even sat down and talked with, even one time."
   Well, there had to have been those, amongst the many thousands he knew personally, who didn't have an overwhelming love for him.  He just wasn't their type.  No harm there.  And as for those who were very close to him and DID love him, it's possible they missed at least a little bit, so close to the trees they did not see the forest.  So there would be room for those who never met him, but saw an overview, from a distance, and were therefore maybe able to see Heath in ways that day-to day living could distract from.  That can't be ruled out.
  So then the question is, did you love him and do you still grieve him?  And if the answer is yes, that love is as legitimate and real, in its own way, as that of those who knew him up-close.  No doubt if you HAD met, there would have been adjustments to make, and more practical judgments, but the love would still be there, even with the adapting to the day-to-day person.
  All am saying is, if you loved him and never met him, and that holds up through the years, it is a legitimate love, formed from a distance, untested by the realities of personal contact, yes, but still real.  That can happen.  I also think, if there's anything after this life, that love would be accepted and returned.  The fact that you DID love, and that it held up, is the only relevant fact, not whether you met.  I hope this might be considered as possible by those who still are suffering, and, please, never rule anything out.  Real love...would always be returned, once known.
  Finally, Heath's tracking of Nick Drake, showed empathy and maybe love, not obsession. He never met Nick Drake, but did identify a soul he thought worthy of investing in, emotionally. He wasn't embarrassed to pursue and embrace a person never personally known.  He felt a connection.  And so, for those who feel that same connection with Heath, he left you the answer, for he had been there, himself.

[chameau]

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there: I do not sleep
I am a thousand winds that blow
I am the diamond glints off snow
I am the sunlight on ripened grain
I am the gentle autumn's rain

Do not stand by my grave and mourn
I am the dew-flecked grass at dawn
Where tranquil oceans meet the land
I am the footprints in the sand
To guide you through the weary day
I am still here, I'll always stay

When you wake up to the morning hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight
I am the stars that shine at night
Do not stand at my grave and cry
I am not there: I did not die

[chameau]

So many beautiful posts here. I still have to go back and read a few pages but all of the ones stemming from Tony’s post of loving and mourning one we have not met hit home.
It is absolutely possible to feel that way and that is evidenced by all of who gather here.
As Lasmusica said, we got to see him in the various incarnations of characters, photos and interviews. We got to know the parts he let us know and that is really no different than the people we know in “real life”. And  we are learning even more about this beautiful soul through the people that did get the privilege of encountering him, even briefly, while he was still amongst us.

There are some that feel this is unnatural or even unhealthy and that is fine- they are entitled to their feelings and by the same token so are we. I had spoken to my oldest friend who got rather unnerved by those that would judge. She isn’t a member here but did see BBM with me and totally gets this forum and in her words “When I heard about it I was sad for him, for his daughter, for his family and friends and sad for all of you on the forum because I know what he means to you (all of us) and what he brought to you.” There was more but she feels it is totally natural and sees nothing odd about the way we all feel and I know she means that because she’d have told me the opposite if she felt it. And due to certain things, I did speak about it with my therapist last week and long story short she feels the same as my friend- there is absolutely nothing wrong with mourning this loss. She had even called me on that night in January to check on me when she heard the news. I had told her about the memorial we left in EC and she thought it was wonderful, in some ways healing and that no one can quantify someone else’s grief- how they grieve, how long they grieve, who they mourn or even why we do. She said it is totally normal especially considering that he meant something in our lives.

When I was in California a whole lifetime ago, my main goal was to go visit Marilyn Monroe’s grave to pay my respects- which I did and I had my walkman and played “Candle in the Wind” and this was a woman who was dead almost a decade before I was even born. I guess that is not really necessary to include in my ramble here but for some reason I felt like saying it. And I guess it kind of goes to the point that we can care for someone we never knew. I know personally I still cry on Sept 11. I (fortunately) didn’t know one person lost that day but did that make me any less sad or heartbroken? No. I cried over Oklahoma City, Hurricane Katrina, the tsunami etc and I didn’t cry for the moment, I followed those stories and wept for those I never knew existed, for a long while.

Do we need to actually know someone to feel anything for them? No, at least IMO. There is a difference in that we had a connection to him, felt we knew him through different mediums and do we love him? You bet. Do we need to justify our feelings? Nope. And I, for one, am so glad to have this place that allows us to express ourselves freely, where we are never alone, to be with those that understand and to not question or be questioned about our feelings.  to everyone

[chameau]

Twenty-two weeks later
You are still here
I can pretend you went somewhere
Doing a shoot in a location far far away
But the reality of missing you
Hit once in a while like a ton of bricks
When out of the blue
A line in a news article saying
You meant to walk the Great Wall with your friends
Would put me into tears and thoughts of you return
For days and days again

I can pretend you went away
Making more great movies and so I wait
For the movies to come out, and I wait
Buying your masterpieces like Candy and Monster's Ball
Pretending they are still new and fresh
But the heart sees through all pretenses
And nothing can hide the missing of you
Twenty-two weeks or twenty-two years
When the cold cruel world lies and cheats and steals
I think of your warm smile, and feel that you are near
I see the sun and the sand and the surf on the shore
I see the happy sweet life in Shelter
And feel again what you intended us to be
You are as real now, as you ever were, as you alway will be

[chameau]

That' s wonderful,Andrew;thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings about Heath with us¡  Yes,twenty-two weeks that seemed so unreal when we thought about that January 22nd.Something like a bad joke,that we can understand nor accept although we know that,unluckily,it's true...I think of your warm smile, and feel that you are near...It's where he's now,in our minds,in our souls,in our hearts,forever. :\'(

[chameau]

I had an experience in school today as well Emelie..Today, for over 3 per., all the Junior student had to go to the Auditorium for a Presentation on Drunk driving. The speaker was an truly amazing man, he got everyones attention, making us laugh, and make us cry (even guys). He was a retired police man, and he told us of experiences he had encountered over the years. Such as boy, named Michael, who was hit by a car, resulting in a head on collision with a tree. He was pronounced dead at the scene. He was only 17 and was a week away from graduation. He wanted to become a caretaker for underprivileged children. It took the speaker awhile to calm down while he told the story, especially when he told about his dad's reaction. I could only begin to image what my family would've gone through. He went through other stories as well and finally, before his time was up, he put on a CD and the song "Forever Young", played through the speakers. That really got to me..

After the man spoke, someone else came up. I'm not sure if I told you this story before but a girl in my school, named Angelica, was only 14, when she hit by a man under the influence of heroine, from the side of the car. Her mom began to speak to us, holding back the tears with every world she spoke. Again, I couldn't even try and imagine what she was going through. They took her to the hospital but nothing could be done, and she died, the same week that Heath was found dead, in his hotel apartment.

I know that most of this had nothing really to do with Heath, well, not until I saw this girl walking back to her seat. I presumed she was one of the girl's friends, because she was wearing a shirt which was in memory of her. I'm not sure what it said on the front, since she was pretty far away, but as she started to leave and go back to her seat, I saw, in big red and black letters "FOREVER IN OUR HEARTS". Immediately, I looked down at my wristband. It was almost the same as FC's quote, "For a moment in our lives, forever in our hearts". Except in the front, it had said "Gone but not forgotten". I know it's not much but it made me think, a lot. I thought, why, do these people, who could've changed the world, who were good people, have to be the ones to be taken so quickly from us? No matter if its someone we knew all our lives, or someone we had never met, they somehow, made a difference in our lives. And in that moment, I realized what my wristband is all about. Sure, it is a tribute to Heath, but the deeper meaning, is a tribute to a young person, innocent but bold, and old soul that only, for a short while, got their chance to shine. Heath, Angelica, Michael, all seemed like they were old souls, all looked at the world in a different way, yet was never able to go on with their plans...why?

[chameau]

Since this is the "In Loving Memory" thread, we should keep the memories "Loving"
We are all different people who mourn in their own way.
We can't say how people should cope with their feelings, so it's nobodies business but theirs.
The best thing we can do is support each other in our feelings and be there for each other.
And I for one, am very happy to have such supporting people with me.
Whether they dream, write down their thoughts or just want to remember him, we should respect their feelings.

So Heath baby, this one is for you, because I want to remember you with a smile!!



your smile can light my life
your smile can make it happy
so smile.
your smile
your smile can turn me up side down
your smile can get me back
so smile.
your smile gives me the strength
your smile makes me forget my weakness
so smile.
your smile is the fountain of felicity
your smile is full of so much cheer
i would love to be under that the fountain
for ever
so smile.

[chameau]

I find this thread and some of the views expressed increasingly worrying. It may be legitimate to mourn the loss of perceived potential but beyond that I think one should not go.

I saw this and truly began to fear responding....fear that I'd say something in anger and annoyance that I would later regret, so I'll try keep this as short as possible.

First, I see that I'm behind in responding to this, it was said, people responded, now lets move on. Except I think it's important to point out why I'm behind in responding. It's because I don't spend all day, everyday, sitting in Heath's memorial thread crying and screaming WHY! I come here when I need to come here, and that's why this thread still exists, because people's need to come here still exists. And if someone else no longer gets that need...then stay out of here. Just like when people didn't like Brokeback existing, if you don't want to see it, turn the channel.

I think it's really sad that there seems to have been a line drawn across the entire ennisjack forum dividing those that agree with the memorial thread, and those that don't. This isn't what brought us to this site, and it is not what continues to hold us here. What brought me here personally was a want, and a need, to go to a place and not be judged for loving and respecting something that is much bigger than myself. What I found here was a group of people that have given me a whole new perspective on loving and respecting my own self, and my beliefs...as well others'.

Do I see a post sometimes and think, "wow, they really seem way too upset about someone they didn't know personally"?  Yes I do. Then a song, or a film, or something comes on, and suddenly I'm really upset, and that judgement of others completely dissapears, and I regret ever having that judgement in the first place. We have no right to decide what is an acceptable mourning period for others anymore that we have the right to decide who lives or dies. Maybe there is higher power that has the right to decide those things, I certainly hope there is, but I seriously doubt if he does, he has an ennisjack account.



This thread is not about judgement, it's about the love and loss of someone who was very real, and talented.

I did not "perceive his potential" I simply appreciated the fact of it's existence.

[chameau]

M Scott Peck said that a community is where people can disagree gracefully, can fight and argue, and remain a family. It is a place where everyone can be a leader, and a follower. It is a place where above all else, the individual is respect as much as the group. It is a place where shared values bind everyone's actions and motivation together function in a cohesive consistent pattern, like a dance.

I have just witnessed this community in action, and it's beautiful. Thank you everyone. You dance beautifully.

 

Why do I love this place? Let me count the ways; let me count the individuals here...

[chameau]

Sometimes, I think life goes on
Listening to Shelter's happy tunes
Feeling the warm caress of the sun
Enjoying the ocean breeze in my hair
Watching the golden sunset on my way home

Then I read about Ennis and Jack
Then I find an old interview of Jake's
And another old interview of Ang Lee's
And I wanted to find one of Heath's
And I realized, the absence of the interview

And I felt, the absence of the man
And I am grateful to remember
And I am thankful to share a happy sunny day
With the memory of the absence of the sunny smile
That warms my heart for all the rest of my days

[chameau]

I was glancing through one of the movie rag magazines and came across a lovely picture of Michelle and Matilda walking along a street in NYC.  Matilda was wearing a little sundress, and the look on her face was 100% Heath.  That was time for a cry.  This little child will always be a reminder of our buddy; she carries his persona on her face.  Will she be like him in any other way?  Probably, since genetics are so powerful.  So, in the midst of the darkness brought by Heath's absence, Matilda brings us light, joy and fond memories of her daddy.
       We can continue to grieve; however, we need to look for ways to heal, too.
       I am worried that I will not be able to attend a theatre showing of TDK.  Everytime I see a poster of Heath as The Joker, I cry.  I want so badly to see the film, but feel it will open up all the wounds again.  (Just some ruminations from my sick mind.....)