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Author Topic: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory  (Read 1732026 times)

Offline chameau

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1740 on: Feb 03, 2008, 08:30 PM »
I watched Brokeback Mountain yesterday, it was a relaxing experience.  I cried of course but cried at the same places and scenes, it was not as painfull as many of you worry now.  I was with Ennis... and Jack.  Not Heath & Jake... It was all about the story of our boys.  And no way you see Heath Ledger in this movie, he totaly vanished under the skin of Ennis, it's the best tribute to art an actor could ever do and not many of them actors could accomplish.  I could only say thank you Heath for this gift, we are blessed. 
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Offline gambrinus

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1741 on: Feb 03, 2008, 08:40 PM »
Because I'd only seen Heath in BBM before he died, first and foremost he'll always be Ennis to me. I haven't watched BBM since, but I know (because Ennis and Heath are so connected in my mind) that I'll imagine that Ennis and Jack are now together. It's not rational, nor maybe healthy, to confuse a real person with a fictional character, but it seems to help somehow.
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Heaven did a recompense as largely send:
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Offline ksxks

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1742 on: Feb 03, 2008, 10:07 PM »
Quote from: chameau on Feb 03, 2008, 08:30 PM
I watched Brokeback Mountain yesterday, it was a relaxing experience.  I cried of course but cried at the same places and scenes, it was not as painfull as many of you worry now.  I was with Ennis... and Jack.  Not Heath & Jake... It was all about the story of our boys.  And no way you see Heath Ledger in this movie, he totaly vanished under the skin of Ennis, it's the best tribute to art an actor could ever do and not many of them actors could accomplish.  I could only say thank you Heath for this gift, we are blessed. 

I'm glad you did this, Cham, and I know what you mean, that Ennis and Jack are just Ennis and Jack.  I always felt that.  But I don't want to watch BBM until in Las Vegas with Brokies.

kathy
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Offline Twisted

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1743 on: Feb 03, 2008, 10:31 PM »
I watched BBM yesterday, and my god it hurt so much to watch it. Couldn't stop crying at all. :\'(
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The most difficult scene was the paragraph where, on the mountain, Ennis holds Jack and rocks back and forth, humming, the moment mixed with childhood loss and his refusal to admit he was holding a man.

- Annie Proulx -



From the vibration of the floorboard on which they both stood, Ennis could feel how hard Jack was shaking.

Offline frenchcda

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1744 on: Feb 03, 2008, 10:57 PM »
I watched " I am not there " yesterday and to my surprise seeing Michelle in the role of Twiggy was very interesting then Heath  and Kate Blanchet was extraordinary  excellent, yet hard to follow, loved Michelle and heath roles
 ^f^
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Offline BBBOY

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1745 on: Feb 03, 2008, 11:31 PM »
I watched Casanova the other night and that movie continues to grow on me. It's a bit of fluff really but the acting is consistently fine. Heath is .....well.....great in it as usual.
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There was some open space between what he knew and what he tried to believe, but nothing could be done about it, and if you can't fix it you've got to stand it.

Ennis, riding against the wind back to the sheep in the treacherous, drunken darken light, thought he'd never had such a good time, felt he could paw the white out of the moon.

Offline LuvJackNasty

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1746 on: Feb 03, 2008, 11:40 PM »
Quote from: ksxks on Feb 03, 2008, 05:37 PM
I watched the Patriot last night.  It's a great story, a wonderful perspective on the Revolutionary War, which is an interesting period of our history anyway, and even more so from this family's perspective (especially father and oldest son), and the people in the local communities.  I really liked it.

As for Heath -- I can see why this was the first movie that made people really take notice of him as a serious actor.  Sometimes I could hardly recognize his voice, though.  In fact, sometimes the Australian movies are my favorites because of his using his real voice (except for Ned Kelly, which I loved for other reasons).  But he was already beyond his years in this role.  For one so young to have such subtlety.

Not to mention, he looked great in those breeches and boots!  Sure enough did, and I'm sure not going to stop saying things like that, his hotness.  He was beautiful, too, with his long curly hair.

There were moments when I saw "Ennis" in Gabriel.  I'd say in almost every movie of his I have seen a moment of Ennis...  But then, I see through Ennis-colored glasses.

We talk about the grief lessening...but I have to say not really, for me.  Maybe the acute pain, yes, but not the chronic.  Because as years stretch out ahead, we will still miss his presence in our lives.

kathy

That was the first movie I saw him in and I loved him in that. But then I lost track of him until BBM- lost track of a lot of things as I was lost in "middle earth" for a good many years but that's another story.

 :ghug: to you. It's not lessening any for me either. I still have thoughts riddled with denial, I think I am done with the anger stage but am very much in the depression and numb stages. I haven't really been posting here much because I can't seem to gather my thoughts enough. Again big hugs to you.  :ghug:
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“What Jack remembered and craved in a way he could neither help nor understand was the time that distant summer on Brokeback when Ennis had come up behind him and pulled him close, the silent embrace satisfying some shared and sexless hunger."

You may say I'm a dreamer But I'm not the only one I hope someday you'll join us And the world will live as one ~ Imagine- J. Lennon

Offline LuvJackNasty

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1747 on: Feb 03, 2008, 11:44 PM »
Quote from: chameau on Feb 03, 2008, 08:30 PM
I watched Brokeback Mountain yesterday, it was a relaxing experience.  I cried of course but cried at the same places and scenes, it was not as painfull as many of you worry now.  I was with Ennis... and Jack.  Not Heath & Jake... It was all about the story of our boys.  And no way you see Heath Ledger in this movie, he totaly vanished under the skin of Ennis, it's the best tribute to art an actor could ever do and not many of them actors could accomplish.  I could only say thank you Heath for this gift, we are blessed. 

I echo that last line.  :ghug:  I'm glad you were able to watch it but I don't foresee me doing it in the near future. I can't go there now- part of me is curious to see if it will offer comfort and more of me is afraid of what will happen if I attempt to watch it. Though I do agree with seeing Jack and Ennis- I always saw them not Heath and Jake but I can barely look at my calendar and BBM stuff at work without tearing up.

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“What Jack remembered and craved in a way he could neither help nor understand was the time that distant summer on Brokeback when Ennis had come up behind him and pulled him close, the silent embrace satisfying some shared and sexless hunger."

You may say I'm a dreamer But I'm not the only one I hope someday you'll join us And the world will live as one ~ Imagine- J. Lennon

Offline LuvJackNasty

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1748 on: Feb 03, 2008, 11:46 PM »
Quote from: NoReins on Feb 03, 2008, 03:52 PM
What a beautiful post guyinjax. I too hope that Heath knew - not just at the end but all the time, how much he was loved and how much of a difference he'd made. I know that he had seen some of the posts on this site thanks to Theresa so I guess maybe he did know.

I for one will never forget the gift that Heath gave me when he brought Ennis to life. It's 'cos a him that I'm like this - part of an incredible community which stretches far beyond the boundaries of the internet. I've made friends here that I hope will last a lifetime. Some of them, I've been lucky enough to meet...others, not yet. But we all share a bond, no matter where we are in the world and it's a bond that I feel has only got stronger over the last fortnight as everyone has rallied round to support, comfort and help each other as we all struggle to come to terms with this loss.

A promise to stay together? You bet.

Beautiful post  :ghug:
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“What Jack remembered and craved in a way he could neither help nor understand was the time that distant summer on Brokeback when Ennis had come up behind him and pulled him close, the silent embrace satisfying some shared and sexless hunger."

You may say I'm a dreamer But I'm not the only one I hope someday you'll join us And the world will live as one ~ Imagine- J. Lennon

Offline LuvJackNasty

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1749 on: Feb 03, 2008, 11:56 PM »
I just went back a page and wanted to offer up some hugs to everyone. Beautiful, touching posts- all of them.  :\'( :ghug:

I can't seem to string together anything that really makes sense. But I keep thinking how AP's words have become even more fitting now- in some weird eerie sense.

There was some open space between what he knew and what he tried to believe, but nothing could be done about it, and if you can’t fix it you’ve got to stand it.

Within a mile Ennis felt like someone was pulling his guts out hand over hand a yard at a time. He stopped at the side of the road and, in the whirling new snow, tried to puke but nothing came up. He felt about as bad as he ever had and it took a long time for the feeling to wear off.

so what we got now is Brokeback Mountain.

The huge sadness of the Northern plains rolled down on him.

only the memory of it, the imagined power of Brokeback Mountain of which nothing was left but what he held in his hands.

I don't know why all of that was running in my head- I wish I could get my own jumbled thoughts out of my head. I just keep waiting to wake up, have it be 1/22 again and just say that was one screwed up, horrible dream.
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“What Jack remembered and craved in a way he could neither help nor understand was the time that distant summer on Brokeback when Ennis had come up behind him and pulled him close, the silent embrace satisfying some shared and sexless hunger."

You may say I'm a dreamer But I'm not the only one I hope someday you'll join us And the world will live as one ~ Imagine- J. Lennon

Offline chameau

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1750 on: Feb 04, 2008, 12:01 AM »
Come here hon'  :ghug:
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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1751 on: Feb 04, 2008, 01:42 AM »
Michelle, friend... :ghug:  :ghug:

I know perfectly how you feel, 'cause I'm feeling it too.... :\'(  :\'( But please try to take care of yourself. Don't let the depression eat you alive; that's horrible. I'm myself fighting against it.

I wish I could be there just to huge you and give you some comfort. I think about you a lot. I feel your pain in so many ways and that just breaks my heart.  :\'(  :\'( I wish you the best sweetie and I want you to smile again. I know that is so difficult, I can not do it myself, but please, promise me that you'll try it, OK?

Try to rest and take care. Big hugs and kisses. I'm always by your side.  :^^)
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Offline NoReins

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1752 on: Feb 04, 2008, 02:10 AM »
Michelle :ghug:
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He will be eternally missed, but he will never be forgotten

Christopher Nolan, accepting the Best Supporting Actor Golden Globe on Heath's behalf.

He was, as an actor and a professional and a human being, one of a kind

Charles Roven, accepting Heath's BAFTA.

This award tonight would have humbly validated Heath's quiet determination to be truly accepted by you all here — his peers within an industry he so loved.

Kim Ledger, accepting Heath's Oscar.

Offline HLJG

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1753 on: Feb 04, 2008, 05:47 AM »
Quote from: chameau on Feb 03, 2008, 08:30 PM
I watched Brokeback Mountain yesterday, it was a relaxing experience.  I cried of course but cried at the same places and scenes, it was not as painfull as many of you worry now.  I was with Ennis... and Jack.  Not Heath & Jake... It was all about the story of our boys.  And no way you see Heath Ledger in this movie, he totaly vanished under the skin of Ennis, it's the best tribute to art an actor could ever do and not many of them actors could accomplish.  I could only say thank you Heath for this gift, we are blessed. 

Just beautiful.  I watched BBM just a week before heath died, and re-read the short story and screenplay.
Heath was Ennis--the very nuances, gestures, grimaces, expressions---everything.
I can't imagine any other actor playing that role---ever.
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Offline christie wood

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1754 on: Feb 04, 2008, 06:05 AM »
Quote from: LuvJackNasty on Feb 03, 2008, 11:56 PM
I just went back a page and wanted to offer up some hugs to everyone. Beautiful, touching posts- all of them.  :\'( :ghug:

I can't seem to string together anything that really makes sense. But I keep thinking how AP's words have become even more fitting now- in some weird eerie sense.

There was some open space between what he knew and what he tried to believe, but nothing could be done about it, and if you can’t fix it you’ve got to stand it.

Within a mile Ennis felt like someone was pulling his guts out hand over hand a yard at a time. He stopped at the side of the road and, in the whirling new snow, tried to puke but nothing came up. He felt about as bad as he ever had and it took a long time for the feeling to wear off.

so what we got now is Brokeback Mountain.

The huge sadness of the Northern plains rolled down on him.

only the memory of it, the imagined power of Brokeback Mountain of which nothing was left but what he held in his hands.

I don't know why all of that was running in my head- I wish I could get my own jumbled thoughts out of my head. I just keep waiting to wake up, have it be 1/22 again and just say that was one screwed up, horrible dream.

Oh Michelle..... :ghug:

I know how you feel, I really do.  Every day I feel the same, wishing and wanting for time to go backwards. I wish this wasn't happening, it's heartbreak of the worst kind.

I can't seem to write much that makes sense either...I read all the gorgeous posts here and wish I could put my feelings into words that go some way to express how I feel, but I can't seem to do it.  So I take solace and comfort from all of you, for offering your thoughts and feelings on this tragic loss, and agreeing with every one of you.   ^f^
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"Look at my boots, old and dingy" - Heath Ledger

Offline lancecowboy

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1755 on: Feb 04, 2008, 08:38 AM »
Quote from: LuvJackNasty on Feb 03, 2008, 11:56 PM
I just went back a page and wanted to offer up some hugs to everyone. Beautiful, touching posts- all of them. :\'( :ghug:

I can't seem to string together anything that really makes sense. But I keep thinking how AP's words have become even more fitting now- in some weird eerie sense.
[...]
I don't know why all of that was running in my head- I wish I could get my own jumbled thoughts out of my head. I just keep waiting to wake up, have it be 1/22 again and just say that was one screwed up, horrible dream.

Michelle,  :ghug:

we all go through this in different ways, and on a different schedule. I am still avoiding Brokeback Mountain the movie, or even the short story, because it breaks me up whenever I open up to its powerful images and words.

I do find comfort in all the posts in this topic because many echo the same feelings I have, and that's my way of sorting out what is in my head. I hope you find your way and be comforted.

 :ghug: :ghug: :ghug:
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Heath, you are loved, like this, always.

Offline lancecowboy

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1756 on: Feb 04, 2008, 08:44 AM »
Quote from: christie wood on Feb 04, 2008, 06:05 AM
Oh Michelle..... :ghug:

I know how you feel, I really do.  Every day I feel the same, wishing and wanting for time to go backwards. I wish this wasn't happening, it's heartbreak of the worst kind.

I can't seem to write much that makes sense either...I read all the gorgeous posts here and wish I could put my feelings into words that go some way to express how I feel, but I can't seem to do it.  So I take solace and comfort from all of you, for offering your thoughts and feelings on this tragic loss, and agreeing with every one of you.   ^f^

Hi, christie wood, everyone contributes to this beautiful topic in different ways. Not everyone needs to write to participate. I remember you made some poignant comments and observation that made me realize something special about Heath. I can't recall the exact instance, but I do remember your contribution.

I see this topic, In Loving Memory, as a tapestry, a quilt, made up of individual contributions, from everyone here.

You don't have to say a lot, to get your points across. Ennis proved that. Heath showed us that.

Thank you.  :ghug:
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Heath, you are loved, like this, always.

Offline Santiago

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1757 on: Feb 04, 2008, 08:52 AM »
hello, from Spain:
first at all, I must apologize, for I haven' got a good English,, but I hope you understand me....
Since Heath's death,, I've watched several times BBM,,, and every time,, I find a new reason about this film big reasons to watch at....
Thank, Ang Lee , for that marvellous film; deep inside of me and some friends is the same feeling,,,A master piece about love and this cinic society,,
the character of Ennis del Mar is helping a lot of people,,,
Wherever you are, Heath,, rest in peace... But I'm sure you're in God's hands....
Santiago, ,, from Spain
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Offline lancecowboy

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1758 on: Feb 04, 2008, 09:11 AM »
Santiago, welcome to Brokeback Mountain. Your English is beautiful because you speak it with love, the language of everyone in this forum.

If you would like to discuss the movie and the characters in it, please feel free to express yourself in the topics found here, under

  Characters, Quotes, and Scenes http://ennisjack.com/index.php?board=37.0 or,
  Impact, Thought and Experiences and  http://ennisjack.com/index.php?board=48.0 or
  Cast, Ang Lee, and Sound Track http://ennisjack.com/index.php?board=47.0

Where ever you post your comments, you can be certain that many others will respond. We all have been touched by the movie and sharing it enriches us all. I am still learning the different layers of meanings, carefully put together by the love of all the casts and crew in the movie, and most of all, by Heath in his understanding and compassionate portrayal of Ennis.

I hope your find comfort in the shared feelings here.

 :ghug:

Quote from: Santiago on Feb 04, 2008, 08:52 AM
hello, from Spain:
first at all, I must apologize, for I haven' got a good English,, but I hope you understand me....
Since Heath's death,, I've watched several times BBM,,, and every time,, I find a new reason about this film big reasons to watch at....
Thank, Ang Lee , for that marvellous film; deep inside of me and some friends is the same feeling,,,A master piece about love and this cinic society,,
the character of Ennis del Mar is helping a lot of people,,,
Wherever you are, Heath,, rest in peace... But I'm sure you're in God's hands....
Santiago, ,, from Spain
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Heath, you are loved, like this, always.

Offline myprivatejack

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1759 on: Feb 04, 2008, 10:43 AM »
Quote from: Santiago on Feb 04, 2008, 08:52 AM
hello, from Spain:
first at all, I must apologize, for I haven' got a good English,, but I hope you understand me....
Since Heath's death,, I've watched several times BBM,,, and every time,, I find a new reason about this film big reasons to watch at....
Thank, Ang Lee , for that marvellous film; deep inside of me and some friends is the same feeling,,,A master piece about love and this cinic society,,
the character of Ennis del Mar is helping a lot of people,,,
Wherever you are, Heath,, rest in peace... But I'm sure you're in God's hands....
Santiago, ,, from Spain

Hello again,Santiago¡ ^f^
You're brave by having watched several times BBM after Heath's death;it's something I couldn´t manage to do still...But,you're right,no matter when and how you watch it,that's for sure you'll find new meanings,new symbolisms,and,yes,new reasons to watch it again.And to feel touched for its images,its strenght and tenderness at the same time and,above all,for Heath's incredible performance;he has given his Ennis character to us,the best gift he could give us and that only for it we'll remember him forever.You'll surely find yourself better by sharing your feelings here,because they're ours also.  :^^)
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Ennis’s eyes gone bright with shock, mouth opening then closing again. “Love?” Ennis said finally, voice strangling in his throat.

Jack smiled sad. “Yeah, Ennis. Love.” Leaned forward and kissed Ennis’s temple, whispered, “What’d you think it was, all this time?”
("If I asked")
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You will be forever in my heart,friends.

Offline KitKat

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1760 on: Feb 04, 2008, 11:12 AM »
Quote from: LuvJackNasty on Feb 03, 2008, 11:56 PM
I just went back a page and wanted to offer up some hugs to everyone. Beautiful, touching posts- all of them.  :\'( :ghug:

I can't seem to string together anything that really makes sense. But I keep thinking how AP's words have become even more fitting now- in some weird eerie sense.
...

I don't know why all of that was running in my head- I wish I could get my own jumbled thoughts out of my head. I just keep waiting to wake up, have it be 1/22 again and just say that was one screwed up, horrible dream.

 :ghug:   I know exactly how you feel.
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Offline Rosie

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1761 on: Feb 04, 2008, 12:25 PM »
 :h) Santiago, and  #$#

Michelle and all...  :ghug: :ghug:
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Danny and me, Danny and me,  Danny and me and the sea,
Bobbing out of Pleasure Bay, the islands on our lee;
Spectacle, Georges, Gallops, the sun-wash on the brine
Castle Island where Skovo danced a bear-dance in bear-time.
The Golden Boy has chosen, I know what I will be
Danny and me, seanchai, Danny and me and the sea.

A Map of the Harbor Islands JG Hayes

Offline jackster

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1762 on: Feb 04, 2008, 12:55 PM »
He Was a Friend Of Mine . . .

Many have recently written about the pain of now watching BBM. My pain isn’t now during the film, Heath does such a great job, to me it’s still ENNIS up there on the screen. The tough time comes later . . . during the credits.

When Wille begins singing He Was Friend of Mine . .  and then, right in sync with his words
“Everytime I think of him, I just can’t keep from crying” . .

H E A T H    L E D G E R

appears alone on the black screen. It’s just too much.

The remaining lyrics of the song seem so incredibly poignant now, I will never, ever, hear that song without thinking now not of Jack, but Heath.

He was a friend of mine
He was a friend of mine
Every time I think of him
I just can't keep from cryin'

'Cause he was a friend of mine



He died on the road
He died on the road
Just keeped on movin’
Never reaped what he could sow
And he was a friend of mine



I stole away and cried
I stole away and cried
Never had too much money
Never been quite satisfied
And he was a friend of mine

He never done no wrong
He never done no wrong

A thousand miles from home
And he never harmed no one
And he was a friend of mine

He was a friend of mine
He was a friend of mine
Every time I hear his name Lord
I just can't keep from cryin'
'Cause he was a friend of mine.

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Offline myprivatejack

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1763 on: Feb 04, 2008, 01:19 PM »
Quote from: jackster on Feb 04, 2008, 12:55 PM
He Was a Friend Of Mine . . .

Many have recently written about the pain of now watching BBM. My pain isn’t now during the film, Heath does such a great job, to me it’s still ENNIS up there on the screen. The tough time comes later . . . during the credits.

When Wille begins singing He Was Friend of Mine . .  and then, right in sync with his words
“Everytime I think of him, I just can’t keep from crying” . .

H E A T H    L E D G E R

appears alone on the black screen. It’s just too much.

The remaining lyrics of the song seem so incredibly poignant now, I will never, ever, hear that song without thinking now not of Jack, but Heath.

He was a friend of mine
He was a friend of mine
Every time I think of him
I just can't keep from cryin'

'Cause he was a friend of mine



He died on the road
He died on the road
Just keeped on movin’
Never reaped what he could sow
And he was a friend of mine



I stole away and cried
I stole away and cried
Never had too much money
Never been quite satisfied
And he was a friend of mine

He never done no wrong
He never done no wrong

A thousand miles from home
And he never harmed no one
And he was a friend of mine

He was a friend of mine
He was a friend of mine
Every time I hear his name Lord
I just can't keep from cryin'
'Cause he was a friend of mine.


I know what you mean,Jackster;this song now is more proper for Heath than for Jack,because it´s real.However,I confess I haven´t seen BBM still completely because I see in it two friends in real life who shared a real love-not sexual,but emotionally speaking,it was a kind of fraternal love in the end-who aren´t going to be in their BBM anymore.And this is too much to stand.
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Ennis’s eyes gone bright with shock, mouth opening then closing again. “Love?” Ennis said finally, voice strangling in his throat.

Jack smiled sad. “Yeah, Ennis. Love.” Leaned forward and kissed Ennis’s temple, whispered, “What’d you think it was, all this time?”
("If I asked")
                         ----------------
Heathcliff Andrew Ledger (1979-2008)/Rajel Karen Ashkenazi (1986-2008)
You will be forever in my heart,friends.

Offline guillaume75

  • Heath as a star in the sky
  • Cassie
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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1764 on: Feb 04, 2008, 01:36 PM »
I went to cinema yesterday. "I'm Not There". I wanted to see his last movie released. When I saw him, I was a bit mourn, but this feeling disappeared because he's such a good acor in this role, as an identity of Bob Dylan. He is great, and beatiful. He acted so well. When I got out the cinema, I was speechless. I'm Not There is a masterpiece.
In August will be released in France The Dark Knight. I am so excited, but also anxious, about his last film, his last great role, probably a character we will never forget.
He passed away 2 weeks ago from now, I bought Brokeback Mountain to see it again, and, actually when I'm stroke by Jack's death, I am about Heath's passing, because this film is my favourite one, and he is no more now. he will now exist through the eternity of his movies.
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babytammy7

  • Guest
Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1765 on: Feb 04, 2008, 02:05 PM »
Quote from: Tony on Feb 04, 2008, 01:30 PM
  I've noticed that some posts over the last several days have mentioned periods of severe reactions still occurring, and it is now about 2 weeks
since we lost Heath.  Am very grateful to those who did, because I've had the same experiences and it was comforting to know I wasn't losing
my mind.  Am especially grateful to Baby Tammy for telling of the haunting dream she had, and to Lance, who has been rightful to everybody.
And, of course, there were others who I've never met on the forum, but now know they are there and wonderful people.
   Grief is bad enough, but I have found emotional instability to be the larger challenge.  A lot of that bad reaction comes from some of the
information reported about Heath's last few months, most of which had been squashed, even before the industry people got that video banned.
I found much of the early reports credible, and they were very hurtful. One, which I ought to be able to mention here, was a tape of Heath
at a news conference openly saying he had had an obsession with the singer Nick Drake, who I looked up on the internet and it turned out
that guy had a terrible sleep disorder.  The early information, then, still lingers on to trouble me, although am fairly comfortable with the
tracking away from those stories and not airing them. But there was enough to flesh out a Heath Ledger that more than ever, deserved the love
we already had for him.   It's kind of standard, now, the advice of many to focus on what was given to us, and to heal up in an orderly way, on some schedule.  But
people don't follow projected graph lines and anything can set off new hurts, even little stuff.  Yesterday, in the photos section, a quote from
Heath was posted, apparently in his own printing.  I can't win.  I studied graphoanalysis somewhat, years ago, and that field is accepted as
legitimate in courts cases.  Am not an expert, but that printing was off the charts in what it revealed: unusual dignity, yet unusual lack of ego.
Athletic and outgoing nature, yet wildly creative.  I would be very surprised if that wasn't his printing and would be glad to be wrong.  Because
even that one little discovery added to what is, for me, an unending torrent of information that we lost much more than we knew.
  Well, wanted to thank the people who have comforted all of us, and ended up rambling.  I really am grateful for all of you being here.


Very beautiful post Tony!!! Thank you so much for being always here, by our side, giving us support and wise words!!  :^^)  :ghug:

I'm quite sad today, but above all, so angry!!! I'm mad at my own friends. Every time I try to share my sorrow and explain how I'm feeling inside to my friends, they always say something stupid like Heath killed himself, or like he killed himself 'cause he was trying to imitate Nick Drake, or like he used to take pills and drugs, or like he was wrong in so many things, or like HE WAS A VERY BAD ACTOR!!!! Oh my......I think I'm going to be alone without friends in a couple of days 'cause I couldn't stand that no more and I said to them very horrible and nasty things.......Why nobody in my RL can understand me?  :\'(  :\'(  :\'(
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Offline Tony

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1766 on: Feb 04, 2008, 02:10 PM »
   Had just done one of my rambling posts, and went back and found Jackster and MyPrivateJack's posts.  It always amazes me what different
gifts people bring to this forum.  Jackster picked out the lyrics that will now completely merge the loss of Heath with the movie we so love.
And MyPrivateJack added to that with that loving heart of hers.  Those 2 posts, got me back on track.
   I do want to return briefly to something I had been saying, before.  We, all of us, were so affected by the film that our unusual response is
the reason for this forum.  We were pre-disposed, then, to an unusual reaction to the loss of Heath.  And that reaction is going to continue
for a long time and be expressed or felt in different ways, because of our different personalities.  Am more and more confident that our little
community is up to the challenge, but I also continue to believe there will be a Post-Heath Syndrome, where emotions fade off and then return,
unexpectedly.  That challenge will be the most difficult, I think, as there will be varying "relapses".  Well, it's not like we don't have experience
there.  Once again-thanks to those who post, and, Jackster's was especially sober, respectful, and yet emotionally right where many of us hope
to be, in time. Stable, but faithful.
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Offline Tony

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Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1767 on: Feb 04, 2008, 02:14 PM »
  BabyTammy,they can't understand because---there's something missing in them, somewhere.  Be glad-your reactions show-nothing's missing
in you.  By the way, you always have my love-just haven't been able to PM, as we'd both be a mess.
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babytammy7

  • Guest
Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1768 on: Feb 04, 2008, 02:40 PM »
Quote from: Tony on Feb 04, 2008, 02:14 PM
  BabyTammy,they can't understand because---there's something missing in them, somewhere.  Be glad-your reactions show-nothing's missing
in you.  By the way, you always have my love-just haven't been able to PM, as we'd both be a mess.

I know friend, don't worry about it. I wanted so bad PM you but I knew well that Heath was a "real" friend of you and I knew my weakness so well too, so, as you said, we'd both a big mess!!! But in the shadows I'm always here caring about you 'cause Ali and I use to talk about you and she said to me a lot of things about how you're feeling.

Thank you one more time for your words Tony!!!Love you cowboy!!  %)
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Offline EDelMar

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  • self-photo up on Brokenback
Re: Heath Ledger - In Loving Memory
« Reply #1769 on: Feb 04, 2008, 10:24 PM »
5 days left!!!
Planning for the Denver remembrance celebration is in full swing!  Registration is OPEN; please fill that out even if you are just still thinking of attending.  We need you!  Call me if you have questions you need answered; 307-840-1020.

Here is the official list of attendees as of February 4, 2008!  This list is a combination of Internet forum members and other attendees.

Blue = Travel booked; attendance 100%!
Yellow = Attendance desired but still uncertain
Red = Attendance unlikely

• A. Jones
• bcatjr
• beckela
• brokebackjack
• C. Seese
• dave
• E. Coyne
• E. Ellis
• E. Recca
• EDelMar
• Front-Ranger
• gailr2000
• HappyAtLast
• ifyoucantfixit
• johnbeene
• jpwagoneer1964
• LauraGigs
• M. Quam
• Marge_Innavera
• ptannen
• rickster
• RodneyWY
• SamChez
• Sid401k
• Vermont Sunset
• wyomen

The 19 'blue' attendees above are coming from CA, CO, FL, KS, MO, OK, TX, VT and WY!

:)  See you at the memorial service.

   -Ennis
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